Abort73.com > Feedback > Abortion Stories > August 14, 2021

#abortionstories @abort73

I feel sorrow, guilt, regret, and embarrassment. I feel like I’m incorrect for feeling sad about this when I was the one who chose...

Abortion Story: Phoenix, AZ

Submitted to Abort73 by a 25-year-old woman on August 14, 2021.

>

I had an abortion in February 2020. I really suppressed my feelings when it first happened. I pretended like it didn’t. My baby would have been due Sept 13th, 2020, which is also my anniversary with my boyfriend—now husband. We have been together 7 years. With the date of what would have been my child’s first birthday approaching, I find myself getting more emotional.

I feel sorrow, guilt, regret, and embarrassment. I feel like I’m incorrect for feeling sad about this when I was the one who chose what I thought was best for me at the time. I’m having a hard time, not necessarily forgiving myself, but allowing myself to grieve. I find it hard to allow myself to be hurt by something I chose.

I don’t have a normal story like others where they aren’t stable, don’t have a loving husband, the money to support the baby, etc. I have all of those. I am married to the love of my life; we live on our own and have a steady income. I just didn’t feel ready. Now, I find that so selfish—like a failure to my baby to let my selfishness get in the way of its beautiful life. I feel grief for doing this to my husband. I feel so extremely terrible, I have forgiven myself, but I have not gotten over the grief hill. I have helped myself with this by getting stronger in my faith and praying a lot. It has helped.

I feel embarrassed when I have an opportunity to talk about it to someone else. All around, I’m just having a hard time allowing myself to be open about my emotions because I feel as if I don’t have the right to feel like this.

I know what’s done is done. It happens for a reason and I cannot change the past, but lately, I find myself having a hard time getting the thoughts out of my head. The thoughts of what I experienced during the procedure, the feelings I kept inside and locked away, and the guilt I feel now talking about my future children. My husband and I plan on having kids soon. It just weighs heavy on my heart thinking what I went through. I feel almost guilty for wanting to try to have a baby now after what I did.

I am not suicidal; I do not hate myself. I already went through heavy, negative emotions previously. Now, I have recovered and developed a very positive, at peace mindset. I just can’t seem to allow myself to grieve. I am trying to become okay with grieving. I want to allow myself to feel grief without embarrassment or such feelings of wrongdoing.

Age: 25
Location: Phoenix, AZ
Date: August 14, 2021

Get Help

If you’re pregnant and contemplating abortion, what a mercy that you’ve found this website! Abortion is not the answer—no matter what anyone is telling you.

Click here to find local help.

Click here for hundreds of real-life abortion stories.

Click here if you've already had an abortion.

Get Involved

Abortion persists because of ignorance, apathy and confusion. Abort73 is working to change that; you can help! Get started below:

Abortion is Awful

Social Media Graphics:

Post them online to introduce your friends, fans or followers to Abort73.com.

Act Justly. Love Mercy.

Abort73 Shirts:

Be a walking billboard for Abort73.com.

Love Lets Live

Abort73 Promo Cards:

Stash some in your wallet or purse and be ready to hand them out or strategically leave them behind.

Love Life

Support Abort73

Abort73 is part of Loxafamosity Ministries, a 501(c)3 nonprofit. We are almost entirely supported by private donations—all of which are tax-deductible. Click here to make a contribution.

Giving Assistant is another way to raise money for Abort73 at thousands of online retailers. Use this link to get started.